Thursday, March 04, 2010
Girl power... and RAGE
I will preface this by saying I have been to happy hour with the girls. Coherency is not necessarily at the forefront right now but passion is... I write when passion overtakes me. So here goes. Forgive my lack of editorial prowess. Not to mention the profanity.
I have a friend... we're not close. She's actually the friend of a friend but I care about her. She's a nice person and... well... GIRL POWER, you know? Anyway. She's in an abusive relationship. I can't even fathom this. If Mr. Cake ever hit me, I would f-ck his sh*t up. Like, BAD. Without a second thought. But he would never do that. And after an evening with my friend, I want to hug and kiss him until he squeals. Because he's a good guy. He loves me and respects me and would NEVER intentionally hurt me.
I don't understand this relationship my friend is in. She says, "I'm going to get hit tonight. I got my hair cut and I smell like beer." WHAT???? WHAT THE F-CK????????? I want to punch and scream and throw a tantrum when I hear that. How can she live with that? HOW??? WHY?!?!?!?
Mr. Cake may not always like my choices or my actions. And he may get a little passive agressive by leaving dirty dishes for me or piling my stray shoes on my side of the bed to make a point... but dear god, the man would never intentionally HURT me.
The only person I love more than Mr. Cake is Connor Cake. And I love myself only a millimeter less than I love Mr. Cake. In drunken, Thirsty Thursday, Happy Hour measurements, I love Mr. Cake, Connor Cake and myself incrementally about the same. For this reason I don't put up with sh*t as it pertains to abuse of any one of those three people. Meaning Mr. Cake, Connor Cake and myself.
If anyone or anything threatens those three people... meaning Mr. Cake, Connor Cake, or myself... I will not stop until that person or thing is annihilated or otherwise contained in such a way that it is no longer a threat. I will get shrill and I will flail around and throw punches. I will contemplate vehicular homocide. I will look around for heavy blunt objects. And to only a slightly lesser degree I feel this way about my friends and family. You know - the people I love and respect.
I want to kick and punch the bad guys. Until its a straight up crime scene. I would lay down a blood bath of insanity if the people I love are threatened. I guess I'm a very LUCKY person that I've never had to officially take this action. I've gotten mouthy. I've gotten bitchy. I've never had to actually shoot anyone. But I swear to f-cking god I would if I had to. No questions asked. Life in prison is no contest against saving someone I love from being hurt.
My friend S.B. (who I know the abused friend through) said, "This is what I go through all the time with her. Don't you see? Until she wants to get away from him, there's nothing we can do!" And sadly, I realize THERE ISN'T. So the victim becomes the villian. I want to shake her. I want her to SEE. I want her to see how beautiful she is and how she doesn't deserve this awful treatment. How there are men out there - who are worthy of respect - who will respect her in return.
I could never love... or respect... or even tolerate... a man who would be abusive towards a woman. Its disgusting. Its one of the most disgusting and repulsive things I can think of. It makes me physically sick and furious at the same time. And I've had such a bad week at work that I want to get my hands on this man and hurt him. Hurt him in worse ways than he hurts my friend. But what does that say about ME? Does that make me no better than him?
I disdain traditional feminism because I kind of feel like feminists need to lighten up... but moments like this make me a true believer. Women are traditionally taken advantage of and are easily made powerless. We are made to feel worthless. Men capitalize on our emotions. Men easily have the upper hand 90% of the time. So much of our world is patriarchal and women are marginalized. Yet without women there would be no world. If we stopped reproducing it would all end. Finis. Finito. Adios motherf-ckers.
Every man has a woman to thank for his existance. But how many men really truly appreciate the fact that without a vagina they would not exist? Its not a particularly manly thing to appreciate, is it?
This horrible abusive man... I have a little "Back to the Future" fantasy... I wish I could have shut the productivity of his mother's womb down in time to save the world from him. He has no worth. There is nothing he could do to make me appreciate his existance. What purpose does he serve if he spends one second abusing a woman? none. NONE WHATSOEVER.
Its horrifying. This terrible, abusive man is HORRIFYING. And my rage toward him horrifies me. The fact that I could imagine myself kicking and biting and scratching and punching and committing countless forms of violence against this man horrifies me to no end. God help me when I sober up. It'll probably be even more horrifying then. But it sure as sh*t won't be any less true.
I have a friend... we're not close. She's actually the friend of a friend but I care about her. She's a nice person and... well... GIRL POWER, you know? Anyway. She's in an abusive relationship. I can't even fathom this. If Mr. Cake ever hit me, I would f-ck his sh*t up. Like, BAD. Without a second thought. But he would never do that. And after an evening with my friend, I want to hug and kiss him until he squeals. Because he's a good guy. He loves me and respects me and would NEVER intentionally hurt me.
I don't understand this relationship my friend is in. She says, "I'm going to get hit tonight. I got my hair cut and I smell like beer." WHAT???? WHAT THE F-CK????????? I want to punch and scream and throw a tantrum when I hear that. How can she live with that? HOW??? WHY?!?!?!?
Mr. Cake may not always like my choices or my actions. And he may get a little passive agressive by leaving dirty dishes for me or piling my stray shoes on my side of the bed to make a point... but dear god, the man would never intentionally HURT me.
The only person I love more than Mr. Cake is Connor Cake. And I love myself only a millimeter less than I love Mr. Cake. In drunken, Thirsty Thursday, Happy Hour measurements, I love Mr. Cake, Connor Cake and myself incrementally about the same. For this reason I don't put up with sh*t as it pertains to abuse of any one of those three people. Meaning Mr. Cake, Connor Cake and myself.
If anyone or anything threatens those three people... meaning Mr. Cake, Connor Cake, or myself... I will not stop until that person or thing is annihilated or otherwise contained in such a way that it is no longer a threat. I will get shrill and I will flail around and throw punches. I will contemplate vehicular homocide. I will look around for heavy blunt objects. And to only a slightly lesser degree I feel this way about my friends and family. You know - the people I love and respect.
I want to kick and punch the bad guys. Until its a straight up crime scene. I would lay down a blood bath of insanity if the people I love are threatened. I guess I'm a very LUCKY person that I've never had to officially take this action. I've gotten mouthy. I've gotten bitchy. I've never had to actually shoot anyone. But I swear to f-cking god I would if I had to. No questions asked. Life in prison is no contest against saving someone I love from being hurt.
My friend S.B. (who I know the abused friend through) said, "This is what I go through all the time with her. Don't you see? Until she wants to get away from him, there's nothing we can do!" And sadly, I realize THERE ISN'T. So the victim becomes the villian. I want to shake her. I want her to SEE. I want her to see how beautiful she is and how she doesn't deserve this awful treatment. How there are men out there - who are worthy of respect - who will respect her in return.
I could never love... or respect... or even tolerate... a man who would be abusive towards a woman. Its disgusting. Its one of the most disgusting and repulsive things I can think of. It makes me physically sick and furious at the same time. And I've had such a bad week at work that I want to get my hands on this man and hurt him. Hurt him in worse ways than he hurts my friend. But what does that say about ME? Does that make me no better than him?
I disdain traditional feminism because I kind of feel like feminists need to lighten up... but moments like this make me a true believer. Women are traditionally taken advantage of and are easily made powerless. We are made to feel worthless. Men capitalize on our emotions. Men easily have the upper hand 90% of the time. So much of our world is patriarchal and women are marginalized. Yet without women there would be no world. If we stopped reproducing it would all end. Finis. Finito. Adios motherf-ckers.
Every man has a woman to thank for his existance. But how many men really truly appreciate the fact that without a vagina they would not exist? Its not a particularly manly thing to appreciate, is it?
This horrible abusive man... I have a little "Back to the Future" fantasy... I wish I could have shut the productivity of his mother's womb down in time to save the world from him. He has no worth. There is nothing he could do to make me appreciate his existance. What purpose does he serve if he spends one second abusing a woman? none. NONE WHATSOEVER.
Its horrifying. This terrible, abusive man is HORRIFYING. And my rage toward him horrifies me. The fact that I could imagine myself kicking and biting and scratching and punching and committing countless forms of violence against this man horrifies me to no end. God help me when I sober up. It'll probably be even more horrifying then. But it sure as sh*t won't be any less true.
// posted by Stephanie Cake @ 3/04/2010 10:15:00 PM 
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