Tuesday, January 23, 2007
It's got cache up the ying yang, baby!
Gotta love the Seinfeld quotes.
I should be working. I have so much writing to do. Sooooo much.
Major distractions at the moment tho. Can't stay focused. Nothing useful. All pure entertainment. Ppl's Court is on.
Finally got my hands on some tunes I've been coveting (Royskopp "Remind Me"... yeah yeah, I know its on the Geico commercial but its a cool tune; DJ Pone & Drixxe "Fighting Man"... Transporter Sndtrk Import is $$$$$... its not on the stupid US release; Notorious MSG "Chinatown Hustler"... Steve introduced me to some nerdcore, its heeheelarious; Lovage "Stroker Ace".... someone gave me a mixed CD a looooong time ago with this one it - took me forever to track down who it was - I've just been too lazy to buy Music to Make Love to Your Old Lady By).
I started knitting this awesome lace pattern this morning while I was waiting for a client's 2 gigs worth of Articulate files to upload. I tink-ed about 5 rows, frogged it twice (doncha just love dorky knitting lingo????) and then gave up. I kept dropping yarn overs and loosing my place on the pattern. The yarn is beautiful tho - gorgeous Alpaca I bought around Thanksgiving - the colorway is hot pink, rust, lime-y green, navy blue and purple. I've been thinking about it all day - I'm going to have to try again this evening.
Must focus. Must be productive. No more ADD behavior.... wonder what I'll have for dinner?
I should be working. I have so much writing to do. Sooooo much.
Major distractions at the moment tho. Can't stay focused. Nothing useful. All pure entertainment. Ppl's Court is on.
Finally got my hands on some tunes I've been coveting (Royskopp "Remind Me"... yeah yeah, I know its on the Geico commercial but its a cool tune; DJ Pone & Drixxe "Fighting Man"... Transporter Sndtrk Import is $$$$$... its not on the stupid US release; Notorious MSG "Chinatown Hustler"... Steve introduced me to some nerdcore, its heeheelarious; Lovage "Stroker Ace".... someone gave me a mixed CD a looooong time ago with this one it - took me forever to track down who it was - I've just been too lazy to buy Music to Make Love to Your Old Lady By).
I started knitting this awesome lace pattern this morning while I was waiting for a client's 2 gigs worth of Articulate files to upload. I tink-ed about 5 rows, frogged it twice (doncha just love dorky knitting lingo????) and then gave up. I kept dropping yarn overs and loosing my place on the pattern. The yarn is beautiful tho - gorgeous Alpaca I bought around Thanksgiving - the colorway is hot pink, rust, lime-y green, navy blue and purple. I've been thinking about it all day - I'm going to have to try again this evening.
Must focus. Must be productive. No more ADD behavior.... wonder what I'll have for dinner?
Friday, January 12, 2007
Fundotardilism
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Jumpstart...
Soooooooo. Via some FORCED motivation, I'm feeling a little better. I think I'm peeking over the edge of the abyss. The crater of despair.
Healthy eating - 1.5 days down. Exercise - yes... altho not what I had planned, its a start. Don't you judge me!
I think I'm gonna go hang out w/ Isa in CA in the early spring. Stop by Ging & Paul's definitely. Maybe see the LA connections if I can get down that way. Hopefully I can get some time off from PP... since Steve and Karin's baby is due sometime in the spring I'm worried about trainer staffing. As it stands we are all scheduled every week through October. Shite. I'm already burned out thinking about it BUT its income so I can't complain.
I think planning for something is giving me something to look forward to personally... since knitting some socks and waiting for the release of the next Harry Potter ain't cutting it.
On a professional note, I've got a bunch of proposals out and some work (which I outta be working on!) as well as some decent prospects. All this is another thing I guess that motivates me. I like having money but unfortunately it doesn't drive me to do much however I s'pose 'a job well done' and nice client list DOES inspire me to be a better person.
Ok. Time to make the donuts.
Healthy eating - 1.5 days down. Exercise - yes... altho not what I had planned, its a start. Don't you judge me!
I think I'm gonna go hang out w/ Isa in CA in the early spring. Stop by Ging & Paul's definitely. Maybe see the LA connections if I can get down that way. Hopefully I can get some time off from PP... since Steve and Karin's baby is due sometime in the spring I'm worried about trainer staffing. As it stands we are all scheduled every week through October. Shite. I'm already burned out thinking about it BUT its income so I can't complain.
I think planning for something is giving me something to look forward to personally... since knitting some socks and waiting for the release of the next Harry Potter ain't cutting it.
On a professional note, I've got a bunch of proposals out and some work (which I outta be working on!) as well as some decent prospects. All this is another thing I guess that motivates me. I like having money but unfortunately it doesn't drive me to do much however I s'pose 'a job well done' and nice client list DOES inspire me to be a better person.
Ok. Time to make the donuts.
Sunday, January 07, 2007
Blast from the Past, Vol. 1, Issue 1
So I found an old journal from college. Inside were a few wonderful gems. I felt like an archeologist looking through all the loot and uncovering the embarassing stuff.
I thought I would print a few things for shits and giggles....
6 April 1992
I guess I find fault w/in others to ease my mind about my own faults [and I've paid for therapy this good???]. But Dr. Crowe is the most beastly woman I've ever encountered in my life [interestingly enough, it took me a minute to remember who she was... but yeah, she was beastly]. References. She makes so many references.... She is so immensely trivial...... There are so many trite individuals in the world that care more about hairspray & turn signals & calories & song singers [danger, will robinson... you become one of these people in about 10 years] than they do about karma & politics & society and preservation of the spirit [politics and karma - interesting dichotomy].
--Art is a complex rite of passage someone goes through to create art [sic] after intense and [sic] contemplation of whatever concept they wish to express [WFT was I talking about?!?!]... SUCK ON THAT ONE, Bill Fisher. Bill is... so open-mindedly closeminded that he pisses me off. Sometimes, most of the time, I HATE him [I learned so much from him though. He was one of the best AFO teachers I had]. But that's only b/c he's just like me, too opinionated, stubborn & proud and self hating. I think I hate Bill so much b/c he's so much like me. I guess I always hate people who are too much like me. I'm too openmindedly close-minded for my own good. [how totally insightful!!!!]
What a riot!!! Open-mindedly closeminded???? I couldn't make something like that up now if I tried!!!
Stay tuned for Issue 2, the rough draft of a letter I had to write to the Dean's List committee, groveling to maintain my academic scholarship. Good times!!!!
I thought I would print a few things for shits and giggles....
6 April 1992
I guess I find fault w/in others to ease my mind about my own faults [and I've paid for therapy this good???]. But Dr. Crowe is the most beastly woman I've ever encountered in my life [interestingly enough, it took me a minute to remember who she was... but yeah, she was beastly]. References. She makes so many references.... She is so immensely trivial...... There are so many trite individuals in the world that care more about hairspray & turn signals & calories & song singers [danger, will robinson... you become one of these people in about 10 years] than they do about karma & politics & society and preservation of the spirit [politics and karma - interesting dichotomy].
--Art is a complex rite of passage someone goes through to create art [sic] after intense and [sic] contemplation of whatever concept they wish to express [WFT was I talking about?!?!]... SUCK ON THAT ONE, Bill Fisher. Bill is... so open-mindedly closeminded that he pisses me off. Sometimes, most of the time, I HATE him [I learned so much from him though. He was one of the best AFO teachers I had]. But that's only b/c he's just like me, too opinionated, stubborn & proud and self hating. I think I hate Bill so much b/c he's so much like me. I guess I always hate people who are too much like me. I'm too openmindedly close-minded for my own good. [how totally insightful!!!!]
What a riot!!! Open-mindedly closeminded???? I couldn't make something like that up now if I tried!!!
Stay tuned for Issue 2, the rough draft of a letter I had to write to the Dean's List committee, groveling to maintain my academic scholarship. Good times!!!!
Riders on the Storm
I'm depressed. I weaned myself off my crazy meds a few months ago and I think I'm regretting it now. Not that they did anything other than keep my head just above water. They also helped me pack on 20+ lbs. And now I'm not at all motivated to diet or exercise.
I have to be honest with myself. I've been feeling like hell. My joints ache. I can literally sit for HOURS in front of the TV. Barely blinking. I've been procrastinating on really basic stuff. Depression. It sucks.
I did have a moment of emotional clarity today. It was probably 5 seconds long. I was driving. It was raining. Not pouring. Just pitter patter. Big, cold drops. And I was listening to track 11 on Versions - the remix of The Doors' Riders on the Storm. I took a deep breath and I kind of nestled down into the layers of the track. And somewhere between that and the memory of sadness that most Doors song incite, I had this brief moment of clarity.
Wish I could bottle that clarity. Its not happy or good feeling or anything. Its just comforting.
I have to be honest with myself. I've been feeling like hell. My joints ache. I can literally sit for HOURS in front of the TV. Barely blinking. I've been procrastinating on really basic stuff. Depression. It sucks.
I did have a moment of emotional clarity today. It was probably 5 seconds long. I was driving. It was raining. Not pouring. Just pitter patter. Big, cold drops. And I was listening to track 11 on Versions - the remix of The Doors' Riders on the Storm. I took a deep breath and I kind of nestled down into the layers of the track. And somewhere between that and the memory of sadness that most Doors song incite, I had this brief moment of clarity.
Wish I could bottle that clarity. Its not happy or good feeling or anything. Its just comforting.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
WARNING: Another rant
AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH! I'm so damn sick of recruiting!!!!!!!!!!!! I know I've said it before but I can't help it. Recruiting is a deceptive whore. There is a reason why there are so many recruiting jobs/opportunities out there. Its because its an impossible fantasy. I hate to be negative but nobody is successful at it. With the exception of massive recruiting houses who have infinite resources and really good relationships with lots of clients.
So I've been trying to fill a position for this random guy for a couple of months. He never gets back to me and when he does its to tell me there is nothing right about the candidates I have sent him.
He sent me a list of contacts and companies to target. Great, I thought. Unfortunately none of these contacts was at all interested in his opening - most never returned my messages or else said a quick thanks-but-no-thanks. I realized that although his company is technology/web oriented, the organization's website looks like it was designed by a 5 year old and one candidate even pointed out a broken link while I was on the phone with him. Totally embarrassing.
The last straw broke the camel's back this morning (hence my rant). A contact of one of the original contacts got in touch with me before Xmas.And the guy seemed like a good fit. A great moment in recruiting, I thought. If only good candidates would find me instead of the other way around... but I digress.
So this morning I finally get a response from him. He claimed that he wasn't sure why I would send such a candidate since the guy had just sold retirement plans and plumbing supplies. He wants someone with technology experience. JESUS. Read exactly four random words on the resume, did you???
The candidate is actually a former aerospace engineer who transistioned into sales working for a GSA plumbing and piping contractor. For the past 5 years he has worked for a nationally known organization doing consultative selling of web based technology solutions (which is very close to what my client's company does). The candidate's target market has been the retirement products industry, which I suppose is where he got "selling retirement plans" from.
I'm done. D.O.N.E. To quote the esteemed Judge Marilyn Milian from the People's Court, "I'm done, I'm done, stick a fork in me, I'm done!"
So I've been trying to fill a position for this random guy for a couple of months. He never gets back to me and when he does its to tell me there is nothing right about the candidates I have sent him.
He sent me a list of contacts and companies to target. Great, I thought. Unfortunately none of these contacts was at all interested in his opening - most never returned my messages or else said a quick thanks-but-no-thanks. I realized that although his company is technology/web oriented, the organization's website looks like it was designed by a 5 year old and one candidate even pointed out a broken link while I was on the phone with him. Totally embarrassing.
The last straw broke the camel's back this morning (hence my rant). A contact of one of the original contacts got in touch with me before Xmas.And the guy seemed like a good fit. A great moment in recruiting, I thought. If only good candidates would find me instead of the other way around... but I digress.
So this morning I finally get a response from him. He claimed that he wasn't sure why I would send such a candidate since the guy had just sold retirement plans and plumbing supplies. He wants someone with technology experience. JESUS. Read exactly four random words on the resume, did you???
The candidate is actually a former aerospace engineer who transistioned into sales working for a GSA plumbing and piping contractor. For the past 5 years he has worked for a nationally known organization doing consultative selling of web based technology solutions (which is very close to what my client's company does). The candidate's target market has been the retirement products industry, which I suppose is where he got "selling retirement plans" from.
I'm done. D.O.N.E. To quote the esteemed Judge Marilyn Milian from the People's Court, "I'm done, I'm done, stick a fork in me, I'm done!"
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